I could write you a small book on all the ways this girl makes me smile until my face hurts. I’ve known Tanner for a year and we’ve read Emily Freeman’s books together and every time I talk with her, I have to remind myself she’s only 18. She makes me laugh and think hard about my own faith and somehow, she makes me want to be just a little more brave. I love watching her follow after Jesus and I can’t wait to see how God continues to write His story in and through her life.
She’s an amazing girl. I think you’ll agree.
Oh, and one more thing. She’s not a blogger. She just wrote this little piece as a gift to me.
And to y’all,too.
If God is real, then it’s okay to live on the edge.
My soul is restless, as I lay wide-awake with different dreams and passions swirling around in my head. I am a senior in high school and the big questions about my plans for next year or what colleges I have been accepted to are all anyone ever seems to be interested in talking to me about now a days. To be completely honest I am so tired of hearing those questions, I could scream.
Word to the wise: Senior year is stressful, y’all.
On top of solving the world’s biggest question of where I will spend the next four years of my life, there is also due date after due date and exam after exam. My brain is exhausted and my heart is heavy-burdened.
The good news is that if God is real, then there is freedom in the Spirit of the Lord. My soul finds peace in this truth and the senior worries melt away, which is so sweet. I am so thankful for these times of peace when I turn my brain off and my heart sees God for who He truly is.
I remember that He is the true source of peace and joy. Hallelujah for that truth. I am sweetly reminded that my GPA and other high school accomplishments are not where I find my identity. My future plans do not even define me because I find my identity in Him and Him alone. These truths set my soul and mind free and I come to the conclusion that if God is real, then it’s okay to live on the edge.
I think that many believers today lack so much life and that brings sadness to my heart. What I mean by that is it often seems to me that we lack joy and purpose. If Jesus loves us and wants us to find life in Him then why is it so hard for us to accept?
I think it is because we do not want to surrender our whole souls to him. We fight it. It often feels like a constant cycle that leaves me feeling empty and in need of peace and security all over again. We become too in love with the things of the world to realize that they cannot give us true life.
We are afraid to give our dreams and our plans to Him because we do not really trust that He knows what He is doing. We believe that we know what is best for us, because let’s face it Jesus never went to high school so how could He possibly know how all of this makes me feel. That all sounds so ridiculous to me when I spell it out but it is something that I have thought so many times.
I believe we cannot find true life in Him until we realize that trusting God with our fears and dreams is really allowing Him to fill our hearts up with the plans that He has for us. I think that is what it means to live on the edge and the more I mature in Him, the more I also believe that this is exactly how he wants me to live.
He wants me to surrender to Him completely and not try to plan my future in a day. I am learning to trust that He already has it all figured out. Living on the edge seems like the perfect place to be right now and when it is time to free fall into these plans of His, I will do so with wild abandon.
So sorry, everyone I still do not have a clue what I am doing with my life after I graduate high school, but I am so extremely excited. My heart is so thankful for the peace of knowing that God is in control and I hope I never lose sight of that.
If God is real, then it is not only okay to live on the edge it is totally rad.
So join me, take a walk on the wild side.
18, high school senior, lover of Jesus, art, and life.
Bless his heart.