I’ve spent four days immersed in pictures and stories, cropping and cutting, and then writing and uploading.
I’m rather spent.
I’ve been thinking that when all of this is done, when all of the tweaking of pages and proofreading of words is finished, that I will have space to breathe.
Right before the last amen last night, we gathered in small groups of 4 and 5 to share those things in which we need to walk in obedience. I rattled off a lot of words that really boiled down to one: Dwell.
I don’t know how dwell. To reside in Christ. To make Him my home. To linger over Him in thought.
I’m at the halfway point in this 40 days of hushing and if I’m honest with y’all, I am chomping at the bits for it to be over. I am more aware today of my lack of sincere quiet time in my heart, my soul, my head. I don’t mean the quiet time in which I sit with pen in hand to jot down notes and answers to Bible study questions. I mean sincere quiet, no doing, or biting my lip in anticipation of the doing, but lingering over Jesus in thought.
I guess I share this to let you know that I am learning every single day that I will never get this all right, all the time. In the deep recesses of my mind, I hold on to the false reality that one day when I’m over 40 (That is my magic number for when I think all Christians reach maturity…laugh. It’s OK.), I will have arrived and figured all of this stuff out. I will walk with a glow and a serene smile on my face and when people see me they will see Jesus.
Really, I believe that.
I sit on my couch right this minute and I run through these thoughts because the people that God has given me will be bounding down the stairs wearing their bedheads and I will be in the doing again. I will get lost in cereal and milk and kids who still don’t know how to clean their own noses and if I whisper the word hush enough times today, maybe…just maybe…I will find myself in a moment of lingering over Jesus in thought.
That’s a tough one.
* On another thought…HOW DO YOU LIKE MY NEW SPACE????? I could cry with joy that all of my margins line up. I could leap for gladness that it’s clean and blue and neat!!! Franchesca Cox from Small Bird Studio designed and installed this over the course of a week and I love it!! I am so thankful for her heart and for her willingness to work with this fickle mama. I have a new blog title, a new domain, a new Facebook page…so you gotta re-subscribe, re-like, and re-favorite my stuff. So sorry for all of that-promise not to do that to you any more…for at least a year. I’ll be doing some give-aways towards the end of the week and we still have a little tweaking to do, so stay tuned. I’m doing a happy dance over here this morning! Hope y’all like it!!